How important is a partner’s support to the success of our visions?
I’ve been playing around with this question for some time now. Back in August I reported that I was in love. Unfortunately the relationship did not work out. I will spare us all the gory details, but one of the ways in which this relationship was not healthy for me is that it did not support my Vision. In fact there were many ways that it had a negative effect on my Vision. Most of that is and was totally on me. I think it came down to picking someone who reflected negative aspects of my identity and self esteem. Looking back I think in a way I chose someone who was going to make it harder to realize my full potential. Why would I do such a crazy thing? FEAR…yes fear again. It just keeps rearing its ugly head (s).
On my Vision Quest I have encountered the 1000-headed monster called Fear in several guises, but one face that occurs most frequently is the fear of taking up my true power. Because of this fear I have reached for things that have helped to keep me down and keep me small. Sadly this recent relationship was one of those things. Rather than picking someone who would act as a mirror that reflected my truly beautiful and powerful self I picked a person who reflected my small shadow self, the self that thinks I don’t deserve love and success.
I don’t regret this relationship at all because it was necessary to confront this negative picture of myself in order to challenge it. Ending the relationship was an important step in saying “NO!” to that negative shadow side of my identity. That ending was another starting point for me in the endless quest to realize my true self. The work now, day by day, is living as the woman I am becoming. It is pretty challenging in many ways but also really exciting.
Are there ways in which you are keeping yourself small? Drop me a line and tell me about it.
(first posted 1.9.10)
