Vision Quest Chronicles #4: Excitement Leads to Fatigue

Welcome to the Chronicles! Thanks so much to those of you who have shared your experience strength and hope around living your Visions!

So today was a BIG day…got up early, ate while getting my taxes ready to be mailed off. Prepared for a board meeting downtown…found out meeting was cancelled…went to post office…made what was to be a short to-do list that included a revision of the survey I’m working on to collect data for the book I’m writing on women living their Visions…decided to do the work stuff quickly and devote real time to the Vision…then got calls and emails asking for stuff on the paying part of my Vision (work side of the house) got all worked up and excited about that! Responded to it. Okay by now it is 8:30 p.m. and I’m TIRED! What the heck??!#^%#?

When my day started I promised myself I would move through my tasks mindfully and calmly. That lasted about half and hour. I revved my engine too high all day and was spent! I put it in park for the evening around 9:00 to eat dinner and watch Oliver Stone’s “W”. I did not even look at the survey.

Someone told me once that you should work on your Vision FIRST not last. We tend to do that and it does not seem to work, at least it didn’t work for me today. I am really too tired to think clearly now. Maybe I will find something in my dreams.

(first posted 4.13.09)

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Vision Quest Chronicles #3: “Real Work” v. Living my Vision

A friend asked me where I am with my Vision. Well…I’m always working on it in my head and by talking to people about their Visions. I do think all of this mulling and marinating is necessary and good BUT I am also concerned that I am using this and being very busy with my “real work” as an excuse. It seems easier sometimes to put my paying work first. I mean who can blame me in this economy? My parental rational mind says “hey you are lucky to have work and while you do.. work!” but something else is saying…”you need to take a look at where you are specifically with the book and committ to some next steps.”

If you have any experience with this I’d love to hear it. Does your Vision ever compete with your “real work”?

(first posted 4.13.09)

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The Vision Quest Chronicles #2: The Demon Ego

What happens to your Vision when you put it out there and you get a negative reaction?

After installment #1 of The Vision Quest Chronicles I solicited feedback, comments and stories from others living their Vision.  I received several kind and supportive comments from people I know and a few contributions.  I appreciated that. Then I received some feedback from a journalist I was acquainted with to which I had a much stronger reaction. His critique held words like “self promotional” “marketing tool” and “not from the heart” but he was only getting warmed up.  He then suggested that I was wasting my reader’s time and concluded, “at 700 words it is hardly an inviting blog.” I have to admit I was shocked and hurt by his criticism and the harsh delivery.

Why did the supportive comments make less of an impression on me? I decided to do some soul searching about my reaction and this is what I found.  I felt vulnerable, because I had put myself out there and felt like I had been told it was not good enough…I was not good enough. I felt misunderstood and somehow shamed. It dredged up my fear of failure.  Maybe I would not achieve my Vision. The worst part was that his words led me temporarily to doubt my Vision and it’s usefulness to others.

I had to look at my part in this. I saw my own self-doubt and lack of confidence in myself and my Vision.  If I were totally confident his words would not affect me. I also brought my characteristic sensitivity to the situation.  I do not have “thick skin.” Also I gave more power to the criticism and this person who I don’t even know than I did to those who were supportive and complimentary. I took his words personally.  Ultimately the biggest mistake I made was giving this stranger more sway over me and my Vision than I was giving to my Higher Power. The point of living your Vision is to bring something to the world and to others and I had made it about me. 

After spending the time on this inventory I ultimately concluded that this experience was a gift. For one it made me look at my intention and my Vision.  It strengthened my resolve in my Vision.  I realized that this experience will help me to empathize with others who experience the same thing and it is preparing me for the reality that when you put your work out there it will be criticized. I will have to get better at handling this.  Perhaps most importantly (remains to be seen) this experience made me realize that the Vision is not about me but service to others and that my ego is not really the important part here. I keep forgetting that!

What I’d like to hear from you is how you have handled similar situations.  In the course of living your Vision how have you dealt with criticism or negative reactions?

(first posted 4.9.09)

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The Vision Quest Chronicles #1: A Cold Night in February 2009

It was a cold night in early Feb. and Rex (my crazy beagle) and I were sitting by the fire. It was late, around 11:00 but I felt like I was just waking up. This happens a lot. Sometimes I get so caught up doing my work that I fail to realize that I am truly living my Vision. But on this night I was filled with excitement as I realized where I am in my life, that I am on the journey of living my Vision. I don’t think our Visions are a state we suddenly arrive at, it’s more of a process or a journey or the way I like to conceptualize it is as The Vision Quest. Even though I call it a quest it’s really the whole process that matters and what you think you are looking for and striving for isn’t always what you find.

Anyway back to that night…I was smiling and my spirit wanted to dance because I was keenly aware that I had truly started working on my book, a Vision I have had for some time. After talking to my editor it had become official, that I am working on it. I was/am excited and scared at the same time. Hopeful but also a bit worried about the future. I was also feeling happy and proud becasue the article in which I was quoted in Black Enterprise was out. I had gotten the magazine that night and read the article. It felt funny in a way as I stepped back to see where I was. I made a conscious effort to just take it in and enjoy the moment because in the past I have often just felt good for a moment then rushed off to the next thing. Sometimes it is a challenge to live in the moment, not just looking to the future, and when I get where I think I’m going.

So, as for the present…the book. It is about women and the process we go through in living our Visions. I think it’s an important story. It is being written for fellow seekers on the path of their Vision. The purpose is to inspire those who are either seeking a clear Vision or who are on the path of living their Visions already. The perspective from which I am writing is not as one who is “there” and telling others how to get “here,” it’s as one who is on the road like everyone else. I know the power of sharing our stories. I am inspired by hearing the stories of others, how they got where they are and where they are at the moment. I know I learn more this way than being told what to do. I’m assuming I can’t be the only one who is inspired in this way. Although I am a success coach, this does not make me an expert on success. My expertise is in helping people achieve their goals and Visions by asking the right questions, sharing my experience where I think it’s helpful, helping them create a framework in which to achieve their Visions and encouraging them along the path. The book will encompass these elements and more.

I’ve decided to use this blog to chronicle the journey of my Vision Quest. I think, like any time we share our stories, it helps the one telling the story and the ones reading the story. That is my intention with the blog and eventually the book. I also want this blog to be a forum for others to share their stories from the journey, so if you want to tell us where you are and what you are up to that is most welcome. I want to hear about where you are. Even if you think you don’t have a Vision or if it’s not clear, I want to hear that. If you feel you are living your Vision I want to hear about that, the struggles and challenges and well as the moments of triumph and feelings that go along with all of this.

N.B. If you would prefer that your comments appear anonymously you may email them to me at Dr.Cutts@nicolecutts.com and I will post them without your name.

Until next time,

Nicole (a.k.a V. Quest)

(first posted 3.2.09)

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Virtual Book Launch Party & Isabelle’s Debut!

You are cordially invited to the…

VIRTUAL BOOK LAUNCH PARTY for “MANY PATHS, MANY FEET: AN ANTHOLOGY OF WOMEN’S STORIES” Saturday March 27 5-8 pm EST @ www.manypathsmanyfeet.com

The authors of “Many Paths, Many Feet: An Anthology of Women’s Stories” will be online for live chats and book discussion. It will be a night full of fun and inspiration!

BOOK DESCRIPTION: “Many Paths, Many Feet” is an Anthology of Women’s Stories. These are stories of Determination, Faith, Inspiration, Resiliency and Triumph! Join fourteen women who take you on a powerful journey with their incredible stories of challenges, perseverance, tenacity and victory! Our stories Join fourteen women who take you on a powerful journey with their incredible stories of challenges, perseverance, tenacity and victory!
At Many Paths, Many Feet we believe the journey is as powerful and rewarding as the destination.

The live event takes place the same night 4-7 pm CST in Houston, TX The Hamill Foundation Conference Center 303 Jackson Hill Street Houston, Texas 77007

Hope to “see” you there!

For more info contact: Dr. Nicole Cutts

Become a fan of: Many Paths, Many Feet

P.S. This is the anthology for which I contributed Book I-The Adventures of Isabelle: The Embryo G*ddess and the Morpho” 

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